Monday, October 4, 2010

Take Two: My Second Marriage Thrives by Grace

I wonder if the title would be better as "My Second Marriage Survives by Grace?"

It's a miracle my husband and I are together to this day. It's definitely a God thing! We were meant to be, we were meant to make it. By the Grace of God we are not only surviving but thriving just as the title says!

Without going into too much detail (since I haven't ran this post by him yet.) I can tell you that we have had our share of problems.

1. Our marriage has survived and thrived through drug abuse

2. Our marriage has survived and thrived through adultry

3. Our marriage has survived and thrived through pornography

4. Our marriage has survived and thrived through a season that came periously close to divorce

5. Our marriage has survived and thrived through ex wives and ex husbands

6. Our marriage has survived and thrived through new inlaws

7. Our marriage has survived and thrived through a blended family situation

My husband was my Knight in Shining Armor. We've grown together, we've learned together and luckily we are almost all grown up! :-)

I've learned through Gods Grace that people really are just like me. You cannot judge them and it doesn't do much good to begrudge them for who they are.

I've learned to accept and even smile when my husband cannot find something that is right in front of him. I've learned to accept and even smile (though sometimes I yell) when he extends himself to help others. Sometimes he extends himself far beyond what I think he should. However, it's not me. It's his life that God is leading him through and although many times I think I know what is best for him - I could be way off base!

I've found myself in a season of my life where I love everything! I love that I am able to stay home. I love that my husband is our provider. I was having coffee with my Mother In Law the other day. She just moved in next door. I honestly cannot think of much that makes me angry about my husband anymore.

Sure there are little quirks but somewhere along the way I realized that they made him unique. Does that mean that we never fight? oh no.. it certainly doesn't mean that! I pity him sometimes for marrying me :-) I'm awful blunt at times and horribly emotional one day but a complete bear the next!

We should not even still be together. After a 6 month separation years ago that involved another woman, a move across the country and countless nasty, nasty things.. A marriage counselor told us we were a miracle. I keep that with me now when I need it!

There is no other reason. With the things we've been through and the tendency of society to believe that marriages are disposable, I know without a doubt that it is Gods Grace that has been the glue.


Constance said...

It's a wise woman (and man) that realize God's grace should saturate our marriages! Grace is something we always need! As nuts as I am about my beloved there are days when I think, "Where is THIS coming from?" I'm sure he does likewise! God's endless mercy and grace extended to each of us is the example HE sets for us in marriage. That's hard because at our core, we are all selfish and want to preserve our self-interests.

Grace says, "I am strong enough and secure enough in WHOSE I am that I am willing to bend".


21st Century Housewife© said...

What a lovely post. Thank you for sharing your experience so openly and honestly. God bless you and your husband.

Lisa notes... said...

How exciting to read your post! Thank you for being so vulnerable and sharing all the things you have been through. It will be a great testimony to others who will read it and who are feeling hopeless. They will discover that there IS hope, not only to survive but to thrive.

bp said...

Thank you for sharing about your marriage and how you are thriving with God and His grace. That is very encouraging to read.

partialemptynester said...

Love your transparency...more people need to hear that God does take care of even the rockiest of marriages, they can survive and come out better for having stuck together! Thank you so much for important for others to hear in this day and age of "I'm better off on my own"!!! Congrats on hanging in there and watching God do His thing!!

Denise said...

Bless you for sharing such a beautiful post.

e-Mom said...

Excellent! Your post should be pasted across the foreheads of every wannabe divorcee.

Thank you for sharing your "miracle" story. You are a living testimony that marriages ought not be disposable, and can survive and even thrive through the most difficult storms.

Thank you for joining us for Marriage Monday today, Jules! You are a blessing!

Blessings, e-Mom @ Chrysalis ღ

Wife of Rob said...

WOW...what incredible places you have been in your life and in your marriage. Thank you for your willingness and your openness in sharing them with us! May God continue to richly bless you and your husband!


nice A said...

I'm so blessed with your testimony, Jules. I'm sure you will inspire more readers with the way you draw your strength from God with everything you've been through.
God bless you and your husband.

Julie Arduini said...

This is so precious of you to share so transparently. You give hope to those who are probably thisclose to filing for divorce. God bless you and your husband for working so hard.

Leah said...

Glory to God! I like hearing real life marriage successes like yours through the trials of life. We have gone through many of the things you mentioned. It's hard hard hard, but I am sure it is worth it. Thanks for stopping by my place earlier!
Striving toward the prize,

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