Tuesday, December 7, 2010


I wrapped my scarf over my ears to block the biting wind as I headed out in the dark on my now weekly journey downtown.

The roads were empty as though it were midnight

The parking lot was virtually empty and the usually vibrant and crowded sidewalks of our parish were deserted

I knocked lightly on the door of the chapel unsure what else to do with the locked door

I suppose it makes sense to lock the door so late at night

I was greeted by three smiling faces

One was joining me

Two were leaving

I found a kneeler and began to pray

The Our Father seemed like a good place to start

Over and over I repeated this prayer in my head

All of my planning and note taking slipped away and I was unsure

I followed with a plea

Show me what to do Lord, I'm new, I'm a baby, I am unsure

I knelt with folded hands for a long time

My black book of prayers sat close beside me like a best friend

I flipped through the book pausing when something caught my eye

I wanted to look at the clock but shamed myself for wanting to do so

I practiced self restraint and averted my eyes

To see only a few minutes gone would be so discouraging

I knelt again speaking from my heart

I spilled out every thing that I was doing wrong

Another plea for help! Show me your way Lord, show me what you will have me do. Not just today but all days. Help me hear you, help me see your way clearly.

A knock sounded on the door

It was light but shattered the silence

Again four people exchanged smiles and goodnights

An hour flew by and I am left with a peace and a longing unlike before

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